A few rules about love and marriage

I read this in Tuesdays with Morrie, and I feel that I should share this small part with everyone (or at least the few people who actually read this blog). Mitch, the author, was asking Morrie, his ailing professor about marriage:

Is there some kind of rule if a marriage is going to work?
Morrie smiled. "Things are not that simple, Mitch."
I know.
"Still," he said, "there are a few rules I know to be true about love and marriage: If you don't respect the other person, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. If you don't know how to compromise, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. If you can't talk openly about what goes on between you, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. And if you don't have a common set of values in life, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. Your values must be alike.
"And the biggest one of those values, Mitch?"
Yes?
"Your belief in the importance of your marriage."
He sniffed, then closed his eyes for a moment.
"Personally," he sighed, his eyes still closed, "I think marriage is a very important thing to do, and you're missing a hell of a lot if you don't try it."
He ended the subject by quoting the poem he believed in like a prayer: "Love each other or perish."

This really touched my heart. First, he said that things are not as simple as having rules, and I completely agree, which is why I don't believe in saying love is this and that. But there are some guidelines that are true about love. Without these, there's going to be a lot of trouble. With these, it still doesn't mean everything will work out, of course. His "rules" are very good guidelines indeed. I see couples who can't talk openly about their problems in the relationship. I see couples who don't even share common values. They're having so much trouble. (I must note here though, that there are couples who are having so much trouble, can't solve the problems, and still together. The people who are suffering just stubbornly refuse to let go of the relationship. I also don't understand why. Maybe such people like the feeling of pain and being tortured?)

And the belief in the importance of your marriage. That is one thing that seems to be lost among many people now. When we look at certain cultures, marriage and divorce just comes so easily.

If you haven't read Tuesdays with Morrie, do read it. There are many copies of the book in the libraries. It'll get you thinking quite a bit about life.